I’m a perfectionist.. I get all my confidence from knowing that my plan is fucking flawless…. and when I don’t know how to make something perfect I procrastinate.
The album is up and available for download.. I just don’t know what to do with it yet.. My plan only came this far… and now it’s terrifying. The last month I’ve been a machine when it came to productivity.. this week I’m literally frozen by fear.
I’m scared nobody will care. I’m scared that I will try everything that I can think of to get this album out there and when it all comes down I FAIL. I haven’t decided the parameters of success or failure.. but I just remember all those accomplishments, that once achieved, were never what I anticipated them to be. It was “Hey, I’m just me, and I’m just here – doing this right now.” Everything didn’t feel like it should have.
It’s got me feeling like I want to run. But at this point, I’ve put the last 8 years of my life into music.. I don’t really know how to do anything else.